On the Couch with Jasminda

Opinion

 

Do you have a pressing problem, annoying anxiety or community conundrum? Jasminda Featherlight, our resident roving Agony Aunt, is here to help. Jasminda will be responding to questions from our News Of The Area papers on a rotating basis. Send your concerns to Jasminda care of edit@mcnota.com.au and include your title, initials and suburb.

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Dear Jasminda,
What is the best way to get over a hangover?
Mr HF, Boat Harbour

Dear Mr HF,
Were you at a party on the weekend? I think I could hear it, and I was a suburb away. Are you talking about the sort of hangover where you consume a bit too much red wine and feel dehydrated the next day, or do you mean the sort of hangover where you wake up with your wrists shackled and your body painted like the guy in that ‘Somebody That I Used To Know’ film clip and a Rottweiler licking the remains of an Espresso Martini off your forehead? I’m not judging either way, Mr HF. I’m just trying to gain a little clarity and perspective on the subject.

I think we all know that the best way to get over a hangover is to avoid the overconsumption of alcohol. It is the same concept as weight gain, where you should avoid over consuming food – a very difficult concept for many people to grasp, given our obesity statistics. But, I know what it is like, Mr HF. You arrive at a party and there is that uncomfortable stage where everyone is being polite, talking about their jobs, their aspirations and little Oskar’s advanced finger painting skills, and so you have a drink to loosen up a bit, and then you have another because you are feeling a bit more socially confident, and before you know it you are dancing on a granite benchtop, amazingly managing to avoid slipping into the sink while slinging back shots of Sambuca and singing Amy Winehouse’s ‘Rehab’, which is just your mouth giving your soaked brain a very important message.

What you really need to do at this point is to get your wits about you and walk home before any physical and emotional damage is done. Boat Harbour is a tiny community, Mr HF. I won’t judge you, but they will, man. They will judge you till you need to relocate to Mullumbimby.

Carpe diem, Jasminda.

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