DEAR Jasminda,

At my brother’s wedding, our mother insisted on leaving my new boyfriend out of all the professional photos because she doubts the relationship will last.

It was humiliating and a bad start to what he and I feel will be a long relationship.

I couldn’t say anything as I didn’t want to ruin my brother’s wedding, but I’m hurt.

Juliette W.

 

Dear Juliette,

In the days before digital media, this was a legitimate problem.

I clearly remember my nanna wanting to stick Tom Cruise’s face over that of my ex-partner in order to retain the photo of us that took pride of place in her loungeroom.

Given the way the lounge-jumping, fist-pumping Cruise turned out, I think her choice was almost as bad as the person being replaced.

Now, however, not only can every average-looking individual be filtered into an unrecognisable supermodel, apps are available to remove people from the photo altogether.

You can, in fact, reinvent a backyard wedding photo complete with a mangy dog, dilapidated swing set, Uncle Joe with his gammy leg, and a bride showing off one too many tribal tattoos, into a classy affair with an island backdrop, guests including Jason Momoa, a carved ice swan, French champagne, and a bride so digitally enhanced that she looks like Adriana Lima.

Your mother could have protected your feelings and included your new beau in at least some of the photos, giving you the option to purchase the ones you wanted.

By strategically placing him on the far end of the line-up, removal would have been simple if your relationship ends.

If it makes you feel any better, given current divorce statistics, there’s a fair degree of likelihood that several couples in the family wedding photos won’t last the distance.

If this happens, you can offer your expertise in photo enhancement, removing all members except the mangy dog, who is a bit rough around the edges, but the least offensive family member in terms of personality.

Carpe diem, Jasminda.